Getting to Know Him

Daily Reading: Matthew 11&12

Matthew 11:1 “And it came to pass, when Jesus had made an end of commanding his twelve disciples, he departed thence to teach and to preach in their cities.”

So…was he done with the instruction part of discipling the twelve? Were they now going out to start their internships? Matthew also says that he went to teach and preach in their cities. Whose cities? The cities the disciples came from; or the cities of all the people who were listening to him? I assume it’s the disciple’s cities. I wish I could understand this better. I know that God will reveal His Word as He needs us to understand it. I’m wondering though if it wouldn’t be beneficial to take a Bible class somewhere. I’d like to know more.

I love verses 7-9 “And as they departed, Jesus began to say unto the multitudes concerning John, What went ye out into the wilderness to see? A reed shaken with the wind? (8) But what went ye out for to see? A man clothed in soft raiment? Behold, they that wear soft clothing are in kings’ houses. (9) But what went ye out for to see? A prophet? Yea, I say unto you, and more than a prophet.”

He just jokes with the people and is so effective here as a speaker. I can hear the people laughing between the questions and while they are being somewhat entertained He is causing them to really question their curiosity. He made them comfortable with admitting their questions and waiting for His answer. He set them up to laugh at themselves and to think for themselves and then to think like Him. It was like He was saying…we’re all friends here…lets be honest with ourselves. We were curious, so we went to see the crazy guy preaching by the river. When we got there…we found ourselves convicted by a prophet…but it was more than that. He was softening our hearts…but why? So that we could accept this man who is least in the kingdom, this man who is greater than Jonah (12:41), greater than Solomon (12:42) and accepting of anyone willing to do the will of His Father as a brother (12:50). What a confusing man this must have been to those who heard Him speak.

I find myself trying so hard to understand even now, what he meant by each phrase he spoke. I love this guy!

Seeing Their Faith

Daily Reading: Matthew 9

Matthew 9:2 "And, behold, they brought to him a man sick of the palsy, lying on a bed: and Jesus seeing their faith said unto the sick of the palsy; Son, be of good cheer; thy sins be forgiven thee."

I've heard this phrase taught on before but I just think there's more to it than what I've heard. "Seeing their faith." What did He see? What was it that made him say...thy sins be forgiven? I think what most people would explain is that in this particular story, though Matthew doesn't include this detail, the man was lowered into the room from the roof because there were so many people who were thronging the door that he couldn't get in. They literally took the roof apart in order to get to Jesus. In my opinion this isn't what he saw when He saw their faith. It's just my opinion and I don't expect anyone to agree with me. I think since it's written in Matthew without the explanation of the whole roof ordeal something else is meant when it says "seeing their faith"

I wonder who "they" were too. Was it his brothers or his father; was it his friends and what made them so passionate toward this sick man? What is faith? Hebrews says it is the substance of things hoped for...the evidence of things unseen. Faith is not necessarily an action. We interpret it that way because of scriptures like "faith without works is dead" from James. I think faith is simply a resignation to the deity of Christ. I wouldn't doubt that these men who carried the sick man were carrying his shoes too so that he could walk home. Were they talking to him and telling him that he could carry his own bed home or was it that they were so anxious to meet Christ that he saw in their eyes the confidence that He would be their redemption? I don't know. I find this verse so intriguing though and I wish so badly that I could have been there. That's another thing...Matthew wasn't there apparently. He tells the story here but he relates in the following verses how Jesus called him to follow him. I would assume that means he had not yet begun to follow Jesus when this story took place. He heard about it...did Jesus tell him about it? Wouldn't that be something if Jesus told him about it but left out the roof part?

I'm going nuts with this. I need to stop typing and move on with my day.

What To Do

Daily Reading: Matthew 8

Jesus healed so many people and so few of them are heard from again. They do not become the great missionaries of their day. Jesus called his disciples from normal every day jobs. Average Joe’s doing average jobs. He did not call Peter from a life of sin into a ministry so that he could give his testimony to thousands upon thousands. He called him from being average to being excellent. Paul was not a vile sinner…he was a pious thinker. God did not lead him from filth to purity…he led him from a perception of purity to the real thing. Paul became a minister of the gospel by accepting truth and doing it. His testimony was not rags to riches it was from religion to relationship and so it is today. I am called of God to live a life that is beyond the mediocre and to pursue a lifestyle that accentuates the Holy Spirit within me. To free that power of God that longs to prove itself by doing those things I know to do and obeying that voice that calls me to live, move and breath the things of God.

Who am I right now and how can I be better at the things God has placed in my hands to do? What do I have to offer that I’ve been too lazy to give? How can I be an excellent wife? What will make me an excellent mother? How can I do excellent service for my church, my friends, and those who are lost?

Matthew 8:4 “And Jesus saith unto him, See thou tell no man; but go thy way, shew thyself to the priest, and offer the gift that Moses commanded, for a testimony unto them.”

The leper wasn’t given a commission to tell the world of the healing power of Jesus…he was told to do what the Scriptures instructed and follow the ordinances of the priests. Do what you already know to do and no more. Your testimony is nothing if you do not obey…your offering is your testimony…give it and keep your mouth shut. How simple.

How often I long to give my testimony. I sit in choir or in the pew and think…Oh…I wish I could tell them what happened to me. But maybe I haven’t given my testimony as instructed in the Bible. No…I do not have an offering to bring to a priest but is there some new testament offering I could give in thanks and praise to God for what He has done? What is the equivalent for today?

Rest

Daily Reading: Psalm 23

Today I’m tired. I just feel the weight of responsibility a little more keenly right now and I want it lifted.

Psalm 23:2 is one of my favorite scriptures….”He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still water.”

Lay down, rest, let the Shepherd do His job and stay out of His way. He can heal, inspire and redefine what it is that I see as broken, dead and hopeless. I must work toward resting and allow myself to be led to places where the water is unbroken by ripples of worry and strife. Rest.

Do You Know My Father?

Daily Reading: Matthew 6

As I read Matthew 6 there is so much to take note of, so much to apply and so much to convict. I go from passage to passage and think of areas of my life that need correction and improvement.

Matthew 6:4 “That thine alms may be in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret himself shall reward thee openly.”

Matthew 6:6 “But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.”

Matthew 6:18 “That thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret: and thy Father which seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.”

Three times Jesus reiterated this phrase…thy Father sees what’s done in secret and rewards it openly. Would He have said it three times if He had not meant it? Would He repeat Himself if He did not wish to show us how important it is. Further but spoken previous is the point that verse 1 makes…”Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of you Father which is in heaven.”

I think the main point Jesus was trying to get across was not so much…the way to get a Father’s reward but more importantly…The Father sees! He knows!

Matthew 6:8 “Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.”

Matthew 6:14-15 “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: (15) But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

Matthew 6: 26 “Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them,. Are ye not much better than they?”

Matthew 6:30 “Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?”

Matthew 6:32 “(For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.”

In eight separate statements, Jesus, emphasizes the truth of who the Father is.

I thought about Jesus’ perspective a bit and how hard it must have been for him to convince people of what He really knew about God. He stood there teaching these people about His Dad. He knew Him and He wanted them to know Him the way He did. He wasn’t trying to teach people not to be materialistic, or vain, or proud, or anything like that…He just wanted them to know His Dad. If we knew God…really knew His personality…we couldn’t be materialistic or self-centered. We wouldn’t struggle with our pride if we knew how in love with us God is. In verse 30 Jesus says…O ye of little faith. He knew that even as He spoke…they weren’t getting it. They were doing what we all do...making a list of what we’re doing right and wrong. They were thinking of ways to improve themselves instead of just resting. Jesus was trying to teach them the basics of faith and we still don’t get it. We search for faith as if it is a plain of higher thinking, but it is not. It is a simple concept of knowing God. God is love, we tell our primary Sunday School children, but we don’t show them how to act when you are loved. We stay busy doing the work of the church and ignoring the kingdom. We seek first the knowledge and allow it to upstage His righteousness and all these things get done by a paycheck that we refuse to let go of, in case God would ask us to send it to Africa.

Matthew 6:34 “Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”

Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. How dreadful to think that we so often try to tackle the evils of tomorrow. Each day is guaranteed to have some evil and there is no use planning for it, or planning to combat it until we are faced with it. O ye of little faith…KNOW GOD!

An Ounce of Prevention

Daily Reading: Psalm 21

Psalm 21:1-3 “The king shall joy in thy strength, O Lord; and in thy salvation how greatly shall he rejoice! (2) Thou has given him his heart’s desire, and hast not withholden the request of his lips. Selah. (3) For thou preventest him with the blessings of goodness: thou settest a crown of pure gold on his head.”

This is interesting that in verse three he says that the king is prevented with blessings of goodness. Prevented from what? That’s my first question, but beyond that…He uses blessings of goodness to do the preventing. I sort of like that thought. I’ll assume that the king is being prevented from some show of power and might, possibly an impending battle with a foreign ruler who needed some discipline. I think that God prevents the king so that He can do what He wants to do in certain situations. The cool thing is that God prevents him with blessings of goodness. Picture it…”Oh, we can’t go to battle today, we’ve just been given the first place award for best overall landscaping in an undeveloped region of Southwest Asia. We have a lot of luncheons to plan and there’s just no time for those pesky Philistines for at least a month.”

I think God often prevents us still with blessings of goodness. How much simpler it is for us to obey when we are distracted. I’m busy enjoying my husband, son and the responsibility of our lives together and don’t have time to meddle in other people’s affairs at times. I’ve noticed at times I get what I ask for and then don’t have time for other people. Maybe God was giving me what I wanted so I’d stay out of other people’s business and allow Him to work. I sometimes feel guilty that I don’t do more for people, but then I read things like this and realize…there is a time and a place for a helping hand. Sometimes God wants us to reach out and sometimes He wants us to stay out. It’s not something I can discern on my own…I need the Holy Spirit to show me when to do something and when to allow the blessings of goodness to prevent my interventions. It takes faith too. It’s hard to sit back and allow prayer to do its work. Prayer is one of the quickest things we do, and one of the most interrupted methods of solving problems. We send out our requests and then run after them to make sure they get done. Enjoy the prevention…enjoy the roadblocks…they are blessings of goodness to you and to the poor soul you were about to help.

Fight or Flight

Daily Reading: Matthew 2

Matthew 2:13-15 “And when they were departed, behold, the angel of the Lord appeareth to Joseph in a dream, saying, Arise, and take the young child and his mother, and flee into Egypt, and be thou there until I bring thee word: For Herod will seek the young child to destroy him. (14) When he arose, he took the young child and his mother by night, and departed into Egypt: (15) And was there until the death of Herod: that it might be fulfilled which was spoken of the Lord by the prophet, saying, Out of Egypt have I called my son.”

I find it interesting that the angel of the Lord gives this message to Joseph. Not so much the giving of the message, but the message itself is interesting to me. I mean…if you read this verse and knew nothing of God or His power you would almost get the impression that He is afraid of Herod. Wouldn’t it have been easier for God to just have killed Herod instead of allowing Herod to kill all those babies? It sounds like He’s running away and allowing all these babies to be destroyed in the process. Some families probably lost more than one child in the mess…children two years and under could even be three children. I can’t imagine the horror of that time. Why would God do it this way?

I don’t have an answer. I really don’t understand it. I’m sure there are theologians that would probably be able to shed some light on it, but I just don’t know.

I do know that God is sovereign and His ways are higher than mine. He must have had good reason and His love for His people didn’t change because He did this. In fact…if I believe that He loves His people as much as He says He does than I cannot believe anything other than what He did was ultimately in the best interest of them and others who would follow. I need not question anything God chooses to do because I believe that He loves me and would not forsake me. This doesn’t change the fact that I don’t understand it, but it allows me to worship Him despite it.

It’s just like Grace. I don’t know why God hasn’t pulled her up from that chair and made her walk, but I know that He loves her more than I do and whatever He chooses to do and whenever He chooses to do it is not my responsibility but His. He is passionately in love with Grace and will do everything in His power to complete the work in her that He has destined for her. What do I know about it?

And He Called His Name

Daily Reading: Matthew 1

Matthew 1:21 & 25 “And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins. (25) And knew her not till she had brought forth her firstborn son: and he called his name JESUS.”

These verses are directed to and about Joseph. I wonder how hard it was for Joseph to give over all his rights of husband and father the way he did. His wife was pregnant when he married her and then he was told what to name “his” first born son and did not sleep with his new wife until after she had given birth the first time. Granted she was still a virgin but a body gets a little messed up after giving birth and Joseph didn’t get to enjoy his new bride in her youth. The interesting thing is that he still had all the responsibility of being a husband and father. I’m sure that there were few people who knew or believed that Joseph had not been the one to impregnate Mary. He had to bear that responsibility and shame with her and then I wonder how long it was from the time they were actually married until the time she gave birth. The entire time he was waiting on this pregnant woman who he must have loved dearly, supporting her and helping her and probably questioning everything the whole time. Everyone is different but I know that most men want to name their sons. They want a junior or they want to give him a name they can be proud of. I’m sure Joseph didn’t dislike the name Jesus, but maybe he had something else in mind. Granted it wasn’t his biological son, but he was going to be the one teaching him and feeding him and taking care of him. If it were me I would want something to attach myself to this boy. Something to give me some ownership and to make my responsibility toward him seem more worthwhile. I don’t know if Joseph felt that way or not but God gave Joseph nothing that would make him feel more like the child’s father. He just obeyed. God must have had a lot of trust in Joseph…what if he had decided to disobey…”I’m going to raise this kid, I’ll name him what I want to name him. His name shall be called, Bob.” What if he had completely hijacked the plan? Kidnapped God’s son and instead of carpentry, taught him the trade of accounting? Obviously that didn’t happen and Joseph was obedient. I guess what I wonder most about Joseph is, did he know what a powerful name he was handing to the rest of the world when he did what God had told him to do and stepped up to his responsibility by naming Mary’s son…Jesus? It was a common name back then but it has become the prefix and suffix of powerful prayer. Jesus is the name that will cause knees that have never bent to bow in humility and tongues that have done nothing but curse, to proclaim that He is Lord. He called his name Jesus…one simple act of humble obedience has given me a name for my Savior.

Proving Him

Daily Reading: Malachi 3 & 4

Malachi 3:10 & 11 “Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it. (11) And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes, and he shall not destroy the fruits of your ground; neither shall your vine cast her fruit before the time in the field, saith the Lord of hosts.”

When God asks us to prove Him it brings this feeling of excitement in me. I feel it when I pray for the sick or lay my hands over those who are forsaken. God is not done and He will prove Himself. What will we see? He is always the same and never predictable, how will He deliver this time? I am glad to be among the congregation of believers who He challenges to challenge Him. In this case He is challenging us to prove His ability to provide for us, not just provide, but His ability to go beyond what we need and fill our vessels until they overflow. He wants to see us prosper and be in health, even as our soul prospers.

This house is waiting for that blessing. I think of the past nine months and some of the months to come as the hard work of harvesting. Pastor has talked before about the way people often look at sowing and reaping. Some people think that they can sow the seed and the harvest will just show up in their barn. You have to go out and reap the harvest and reaping is the hardest part. Kris and I have been faithful to sow seed when given opportunity and God has been faithful to give us a harvest but taking it all in is hard work. It’s a lot of waiting and a lot of wondering and a lot of reminding ourselves that truth is an unbending bridge and it will be the only way to get to the goal we are looking at.

Not only is He faithful to do what He says…He will also defend us as we go out to harvest. The devourer comes to ruin the seed that is planted. He tries to destroy the fruit that comes or even throw off the timing and bring the fruit too early. When that happens, the fruit is bitter and small…it never ripens as it should. God says he will rebuke this devourer and he will not be successful in this cause.

Sparks, Triggers and Inspiration

Daily Reading: Malachi 1&2, Psalm 8, 38, 68

Psalm 68:27 “There is little Benjamin with their ruler, the princes of Judah and their council, the princes of Zebulun, and the princes of Naphtali.”

Yes…I know…this doesn’t sound like it has anything to do with much of anything else, but this verse sparked a thought that triggered a memory and inspired a decision.

The Thought that was Sparked: As I read verse 27 I thought about Benjamin and the fact that King Saul was from the tribe of Benjamin. He was so humble as he began his life of royalty but pride soon overtook him and he was lost to it. In his folly he made a way for a young soldier by the name of David to rise up and learn to follow the heart of God from an earthly throne. God had become displeased with Saul and found His own heart in David. David was from the tribe of Judah and I wonder…because I have not studied this…if the prophesies of the coming Messiah were spoken before or after David became king? Here’s where I’m going with this. Is it possible that Saul and the tribe of Benjamin would have been the ancestral line of Christ if Saul had not thought so highly of himself and sinned before God? Is it possible that God was looking for someone to do His will and at first Saul filled the bill but as things changed, God once again had to go on a search for a humble and willing heart? Is it possible that once God had favored David and promised him that his descendants would always sit on the throne of Israel, He had to look for a young woman to carry His son as Mary did? Is it possible that it could have been someone else if they had shown the humility and grace that Mary did? Is it possible that the Messiah could have come much sooner if there had been someone capable of being the virgin mother of Christ? Is it possible that even now God has prophesy to fulfill but He is searching for someone who is willing, able and humble enough to get the job done?

The Memory that was Triggered: Sunday, pastor Davis asked us if any of us felt that there was more we are destined to do in the Kingdom of God. Many of us raised our hands. He went on to talk about being in the river and that if you want to be used of God you have to be where the Spirit is flowing, allowing the Holy Spirit to carry you, move you and flow through you. God doesn’t choose his vessels from neatly stacked rows of shiny pots and glimmering vases. He goes to the river and seeks a stone. Just as David went to the river to get 5 smooth stones, one of which killed the giant, God goes looking for smooth stones. People who have been rubbed smooth by the water and the contact with so many other stones. God looks for ready warriors and humble servants. He has so much to get done and so few vessels to work with.

The Decision that was Inspired: I will go to the river…not just to wet my feet, not just to cool my throat, not just to wash my hands, but to take a dive. I will not let my mind continue to justify the world’s standards of morality and decency…I will be a smooth stone, found in the river and ready to be used. I expect this to take time. I expect to see other stones chosen before me and I expect to find the process uncomfortable. I will not leave the river. Yesterday afternoon, we saw a movie…a good, funny, even moral by many standards, movie. However…there was that one f word and a few s words and of course there was that little bit of story that turned out good despite the lie that birthed it’s plot. I still feel that it deserved a thumbs up. I want it to be a good movie because I liked it so much. I want to justify it and hold it up to God and say…this isn’t bad…but I can’t. No matter how hard I try…I can’t hold it up to the Word and still see it as what it should be. I can only see that it is lacking. It frustrates me, but truth is an ever burning fire that will devour what is false. If I do not turn and face God with repentance, I have stepped out of the river…that’s the key. I am not going to tell everyone what a horrible movie it was…in fact I’m not even going to say that I didn’t think it was good. I just can’t go that way myself any more. I have to hold up a standard. Not because I’m afraid of going to Hell. I don’t think that movie would send me to Hell. I must hold up the standard because I need to be used of God. I need Him to be able to look at me and say…she’s the one...she’s going to do that which needs to be done. I want to be chosen…I want to be ready and I must stay in the river. So what is my decision specifically? Well, it’s to be discerning and know what things will drag me from the cool water and throw me to the banks where I find myself dry and thirsty. I am just going to commit to being where God wants me at all times and specifically today I am going to get on my knees and do that repenting that I need to do.

The Upright In Heart

Daily Reading: Zechariah 14, Psalm 4, 34, 64

Psalm 64:10 “The righteous shall be glad in the Lord, and shall trust in him; and all the upright in heart shall glory.”

I am thinking to myself how self-righteous I can be. Hoping that I do not come across to others the way I sometimes look to myself. Just a little while ago I called the church and questioned the receptionist about whether or not there was child-care at the church. I did what I had to do…I wasn’t doing anything wrong…but I felt like I had nailed her down and possibly made her feel bad for giving out bad information. After I hung up I questioned myself. “Do you think you need to fix everything?” I tried very hard to be nice and not sound arrogant to the receptionist but I still felt bad after I hung up. I remember being the receptionist and I hated it when people questioned me, or asked me where I got my information. I was defensive and thought…”do you think I’m stupid just because I’m a receptionist? Do you think I’m lying to you to get you off the phone because I’m a slacker with a mediocre job? What do you think…that I am not capable of knowing what I’m talking about because I’m JUST a receptionist?” I felt so frustrated in that position and wished I could prove to people how capable I really was. Now here I am on the other side of the phone thinking…I know this girl doesn’t know what she’s talking about and I’ve got to get the facts. I can only hope that poor Amy is not as self absorbed and defensive as I was. I really was nice to her and tried very hard not to be belittling. She did everything right…got the information, asked the right people and offered all the help she could. I guess I am once again realizing how silly I was and can still be I’m sure. What does that have to do with Psalm 64:10? Well, just this…the upright in heart shall glory. My heart has not always been upright. No matter how good things are if your heart is not upright you won’t glory. You won’t worship, you won’t appreciate the goodness around you. It’s like this morning. All morning we had absolutely beautiful weather but I didn’t know it because I didn’t go outside, open any windows or look at the evidence around me that was screaming to me to come out and enjoy it. If I had realized it earlier I would have opened some windows and let in the sunshine and warm air a lot sooner. As it was I opened them just in time for the rain to start. A heart that is not upright can’t appreciate all the good around them. They have the windows to their soul closed because they are protecting their esteem and their ego. I wonder sometimes as I look back at the jobs I’ve had and some of the frustrations I endured, what did I miss? How many times did I have opportunity to glory but my heart was upside down?

Just before I started writing this journal I called a couple from our Sunday School class who just had a baby and are getting meals delivered to them. She and I talked about the baby and I was able to give her some suggestions for his jaundice. We talked about Sunshine and I was sincere in my desire to help her. Nothing false led me to talk about how to get the little guy into the sunshine and let it soak into his skin…I told her that because I want to encourage her and help that baby become healthy. It was raining as we talked but just after I started typing I felt the sun warm my shoulder through the window. I began to smile and just thanked God for healing sunshine and the opportunity she now had to get that baby into its rays. She lives very close by so I knew that she was getting that same opening of sky that I was. At that moment my soul was open and my heart was upright as I intended to serve her and her baby…I gloried in the sunshine because of it. Had I been thinking of only my daily routine and what not…I would still have felt the sunshine but it wouldn’t have meant anything to me.

Shine
Shine down on me Jesus
I want to see what you see around me
How many tears have I wasted on circumstance?
How many moments were stolen by fear, what’s it worth?
In the palm of your hand
Help me to stand
Shine down on me.

He Only Is My Rock

Daily Reading: Zechariah 12&13, Psalm 2, 32, 62

Psalm 62:1&2 “Truly my soul waiteth upon God: from him cometh my salvation. (2) He only is my rock and my salvation; he is my defense; I shall not be greatly moved.”

The past nine months have been a test of who we trust. Our minds have been stretched and our faith has become firm in this time. My concerns have ranged from wondering what people have thought of our decisions, to will I have enough money to buy my son pajamas? I find myself grinding my teeth at times and wonder if it’s a sign that my faith isn’t strong enough. I am resolved however to plowing through. I don’t pretend to think that I am able to resolve the issues that we are wading in, but I am just stubborn enough to believe that I can get through these things without losing my mind. I can’t fix it, but I can laugh at it and I can worship despite it and I can give God full glory for each day, and each triumph and each promise that leads me to trust Him more. There is something I know, and I will not let what looks logical or wise by earthly standards become more powerful than the direction that God has pointed us in. What I know is that God has led us, that He does not disappoint and that from Him, cometh my salvation. No other avenue can be trusted. Kris’ job is not our salvation, Kris’ next bonus check, website jobs and tax returns are not our salvation. God uses these things to get us through and His timing has been absolutely incredible. We are thankful for these things, believing that all of them have been blessings from God and not from the cleverness of our own minds or the cunning of our own hands. God only is my rock.

Psalm 62:5-12 “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. (6) He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defense; I shall not be moved. (7) In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God. (8) Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah. (9) Surely men of low degree are vanity, and men of high degree are a lie: to be laid in the balance, they are altogether lighter than vanity. (10) Trust not in oppression, and become not vain in robbery: if riches increase, set not your heart upon them. (11) God hath spoken once; twice have I heard this: that power belongeth unto God. (12) Also unto thee, O Lord, belongeth mercy: for thou renderest to every man according to his work.”

I shall not be moved. I am set on a course and to move would be to deviate from it. I am focused on a goal and I have a defense to guard my way. I still believe that one way or another not only will we be out from under two mortgage payments but we will see that God has paid for this house. He wanted us here. I believe that beyond all doubt. When we decided to do this I don’t think either of us knew what a great blessing it would be. I think we saw only the house. I think now that God wants this house paid for and our finances opened up to His work. I think He wants us to give and give until there is doubt as to our wisdom and common sense. We will believe for His provision and He will render to us according to our work. Not our work for man, but our work for His kingdom.

Proud Doer

Daily Reading: Zechariah 10&11, Psalm 1, 31

Psalm 1:1-3 “Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. (2) But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. (3) And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper.”

One of my absolute favorite scriptures. Such promise. To know that there is reward for living upright and delighting in the law of the Lord. I think people get these attitudes confused with religion sometimes and that’s not what it’s about. It’s about showing honor and respect to God. It’s worship in the form of surrender. I will live in such a way that God is glorified. The way to do that is by honoring his Word and His law…whether I have to or not. No…I am not under law but I am humbling myself to serve the law and the author of it by obeying it. I am free to do it…I get to.

Psalm 31:23&24 “O love the Lord, all ye his saints: for the Lord preserveth the faithful, and plentifully rewardeth the proud doer. (24) Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the Lord.”

The proud doer. I just wrote that it’s humbling to serve the law and this verse says the doer is proud. I guess the difference is that we are proud of the law of the Lord…it is what we are delighting in. How could you delight in something you aren’t proud of…something you don’t respect. We respect and find pride in the law of the Lord and we serve it humbly. Our hope is in the Lord…verse 24…and that hope is secure. We find ourselves completely secure regardless of the pain that comes from living here on this earth. We are strengthened because we hope.

I am tired this afternoon. I find that I have little to say and am little able to comprehend what I read at times. My insights are more or less ramblings and I wonder at my own inability to make sense of common sense.

I know this…God is good…I will rest in that hope…I will serve that truth…it is my delight.

I Shall Not Die, But Live

Daily Reading: Zechariah 9, Psalm 28, 58, 88, 118

Psalm 118:17-19 “I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord. (18) The Lord hath chastened me sore: but he hath not given me over unto death. (19) Open to me the gates of righteousness: I will go into them, and I will praise the Lord:”

Rarely are we faced with the possibility that what we are going through would bring us death but I see this scripture as a common plight for me. There are trials, testing and disciplines that seem insurmountable at times. No…they will not kill me but they seem to want to drag me down so deep that I cannot see the light of day. Although I would say that the whole tubal pregnancy thing came close to being a life or death situation. I wasn’t afraid of dying though. I think it’s the little things that really get to me. The things that make me worry and the things that make me cringe at my failures or stupidity. Those situations cause me to choose…death or life. I shall not die but live…and declare the works of the Lord. It doesn’t matter what it looks like or how horrible I feel about it I am not on earth to declare the works of my mind or my hands…I will declare the works of the Lord. Yes, as verse 18 says, I am chastened sore, my heart is pained by my own doing and the shame I have endured by the realization of my depravity, but God does not give me over to death…I am now disciplined I have received whatever chastisement I deserve from my Father and I am free as never before to walk through the gates of righteousness. I will go in and I will praise the Lord. No wasting time trying to clean myself up with filthy rags…just open the gates! I am free to go in…I don’t care what I did or who I did it to…God has forgiven me, chastened me and brought me to life…the gates are no longer closed for me. It’s interesting to me that no matter how righteous we truly are…we are not carried into the gates of righteousness we have to get up and test the legs of the new creation that we are. We make a choice to either live on the side of death or on the side of life. Passing through the gates of righteousness we choose to believe the forgiving and merciful grace of God and stand up in His righteousness as whole and newborn. We declare as the Psalmist did…I will go into them, and I will praise the Lord.

Paths of Mercy and Truth

Daily Reading: Zechariah 7 & 8, Psalm 25, 55, 85, 115, 145

Psalm 25:4 “Shew me thy ways, O Lord; teach me thy paths.” Whenever I read that I picture a forest that is overgrown and though there are paths cut out and obvious…God’s ways are covered and He has to lift some of the brambles and vines in order to teach us His paths. His paths are narrow and overgrown from lack of use. Once you are on His path the way is firm, but the path is hard and because few choose to take it, it can be lonely.

Psalm 25:10 “All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth unto such as keep his covenant and his testimonies.” His paths are mercy and truth to those who are faithful to His ways. You can’t walk His paths with idle mind or selfish ambition. There isn’t room for what you want to take and what He wants you to take on the same path…in fact…you can’t take anything with you. He will carry whatever you need. He said that His yoke is easy and His burden is light…He wants your hands free and your feet swift.

Psalm 55:22 “Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.” The righteous shall never be moved… shaken… disturbed… afraid… deprived or left alone. We are sustained by an ever present guide and companion who shows us a path that is difficult, but rewarding and then allows us to give Him every ounce of baggage we think we are going to need along the way. Little by little He proves to us that we have never needed any of it and that if we trade in our burden for His…we will find ourselves delivered in peace from the enemy of deception and confusion.

Psalm 85:10-13 “Mercy and truth are met together; righteousness and peace have kissed each other. (11) Truth shall spring out of the earth; and righteousness shall look down from heaven. (12) Yea, the Lord shall give that which is good; and our land shall yield her increase. (13) Righteousness shall go before him; and shall set us in the way of his steps.” Mercy and truth again…these are the definition of the paths of the Lord according to Psalm 25:10. These paths meet each other and are taken by righteousness and peace who commune with one another and are so close they literally kiss each other…they love each other…they are not the same without the other. Truth springs out of the earth…coming up from the foundation and righteousness looks down from the canopy above…We are surrounded, covered above and supported beneath by the absolute reality of the love of God. His law and His goodness are met in our hearts as we walk this road of mercy and truth. How can we even consider going another way?

Psalm 115:1 “Not unto us, O Lord, not unto us, but unto thy name give glory, for thy mercy, and for thy truth’s sake.” Give glory to the name of the Lord for the sake of the pathways. For the sake of the clear understanding and open door to peace…give glory to the name of the Lord.

My hope is set on the reality of these words. Knowing that I am guided by a hand that longs to set me on paths of mercy and truth allows me to take each step with confidence and look before me with joy.

Followed by Goodness and Mercy

Daily Reading: Zechariah 4-6, Psalm 23

Psalm 23:6 “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.”

I love the 23rd Psalm. The first verses I memorized as a child were these 6 and they ring in my head in so many situations. When my mom was sick with cancer…”yeah, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.” So often in situations where I want to reach in and “do something” but I don’t know what to do and I don’t necessarily have the leading of the Holy Spirit as to direction I hear Him whisper the words “He maketh me to lie down in green pastures.” The words to this Psalm have fit into so many circumstances and verse six sums it all up…the goodness and mercy of the Lord are concentrated in His Word. His Word is life and security for me. And that assurance follows me wherever I go, allowing me to dwell in the house of the Lord for ever. What goodness! What sweet goodness it is to live in such security. The Word of God wraps itself around us when we seek the truth it holds. As we get closer and closer to the life it brings we find it is seeking us and the life we need.

A Good Name

Daily Reading: Zechariah 2&3, Psalm 22, 52, 82, 112, 142, Proverbs 22

Psalm 52:9 “I will praise thee for ever, because thou hast done it: and I will wait on thy name; for it is good before thy saints.”

In the same verse he says both that it is done and that he will wait. This is the way it is. Here is faith. Faith knows that the work is done and beyond that faith knows that the name of the Lord is unfailing. It is a good name…I can wait without shame on that which has been signed for by the Lord because His name is good. His account is caught up, and His integrity is beyond reproach. He never fails.

Psalm 112:1-4 “Praise ye the Lord. Blessed is the man that feareth the Lord, that delighteth greatly in his commandments. (2) His seed shall be mighty upon the earth: the generation of the upright shall be blessed. (3) Wealth and riches shall be in his house: and his righteousness endureth for ever. (4) Unto the upright there ariseth light in the darkness: he is gracious, and full of compassion, and righteous.”

I like this…the man that fears the Lord and delights in His commandments will have seed mighty upon the earth…wealth and riches…righteousness that endures and light in dark times or places. Who wouldn’t want this as a legacy? To live a life that is honoring to God more than yourself and reap rewards such as these would be so incredible. I want this. I want to have such assurance as this and live with this sort of faith.

Proverbs 22:1 “A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favour rather than silver and gold.”

This verse speaks of integrity being of greater importance than riches. The verses I quoted previously would set me thinking that a good name is none other than the name of the Lord and that if I choose to honor that name, He will bless me with the riches and favor that I cannot attain on my own. My goal will be His presence and my aim will be his heart. I cannot fail to be blessed if I am seeking Him and longing to understand His ways.

Trust in Him, I have to trust that yesterday’s moments of pain are not the end of my reward. Eternity must hold more than just a nice place to live. Eternity will be resolution, it will be affirmation and kind encounters. Eternity will be the warmth we missed from broken childhoods and the filling in of voids left after painful separation. Eternity will bless us beyond the capabilities of this world and we will be free to enjoy all that it has for us.

Lighting the Candle

Daily Reading: Zechariah, Psalm 18, Psalm 48

Psalm 18:28 “For thou wilt light my candle: the Lord my God will enlighten my darkness.”

Last night we went to the monthly leadership meeting at church. We watched a video that was basically a drama played out at a church. It was a monologue of a girl who was explaining why the church doesn’t reach her generation. It was touching and really insightful. I sat there and felt so out of touch with the people I’m supposed to be ministering to. The video was actually several years old and the generation she portrayed is now the same group who are sitting in my newlywed class right now. I felt so convicted that I didn’t know this group of young men and women. It is true that I cannot ever relate to them on an empathetic level, but I need to understand them. I need to know what my words mean to them. How truth is interpreted by them and what it takes to make them understand the reality of absolute truth. Granted the couples we are working with are all saved, but are they sure? Are they confident? Do they really know how much God loves them? Do they know what commitment is? Do they understand that they really can have successful marriages? The Lord will enlighten my darkness. Those areas where I cannot see beyond my own experiences and my own convictions…He will walk with me and light my candle so that I can see the difference in me and them…so that I can see the confusion that they are bearing and show them the same light that guides me can reveal truth to them. I felt so strongly last night that my prayers for these couples have been slightly amiss. That I have not prayed enough for their individual hurts to be healed, for their minds to be transformed and their hearts molded correctly. What an opportunity…to come to Christ with your mate and know that as you are learning to know who Jesus is…He is conforming you to himself as you are conforming to each other. How tight the bond will be when these young Christians are fully dedicated to the things of God.

Psalm 48:14 “For this God is our God forever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death.”

I think one of the things that keeps me from relating to people is my fear of taking risk. It’s a risk to ask personal questions. What if they don’t like me? What if I hurt their feelings? What if it’s none of my business? What if they think I’m so naïve, I’m stupid? Wouldn’t it be better if I just make myself available and if they want to come to me, they can? No! Not anymore…ouch…I don’t like this. God will be our guide…even unto death. This death is not a heart stops beating, throw her in the coffin death…for me this verse is talking about my flesh dying to the Holy Spirit. I need to stop being afraid. He will guide me to the death of my flesh and to the revelation and power of the Holy Spirit. I have to move beyond what’s comfortable. That sounds so cliché and in truth…I’ve always felt like I’ve done that, but there are still areas I’m afraid to go. I need to constantly be aware that God is my God not just forever, but wherever. He will guide…as that guide, He will protect, He will comfort and He will be glorified. Sometimes I wonder if I’ve ever given Him the opportunities He’s desired. Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thank God…I am not confined to what I am capable of…Bless the Lord Oh My Soul, for He hath redeemed me and I am a new creature. Lord, help me recognize the flesh that so desires to creep from below my new feet and do the work that only you can do.

Made as a Signet

Daily Reading: Haggai

Haggai 2:19 “Is the seed yet in the barn? Yea, as yet the vine, and the fig tree, and the pomegranate, and the olive tree, hath not brought forth: from this day will I bless you.”

Haggai 2:23 “In that day, saith the Lord of hosts, will I take thee, O Zerubbabel, my servant, the son of Shealtiel, saith the Lord, and will make thee as a signet: for I have chosen thee, saith the Lord of hosts.”

The first verse here stood out to me because of it’s promise. From this day will I bless you. Maybe it doesn’t look like anything is happening, maybe the trees and the vine are still bare but it takes time to produce fruit but when it comes you will be amazed at the abundance. That’s not exactly what it says but that’s the picture I get from reading it. Don’t be discouraged by what you see...blessing is not dependant on what your imagination is capable of…God can make son’s from rocks…He can make something from nothing and He can make blessings out of despair.

In the second verse His words to Zerubbabel are so inspiring…I wish to hear Him speak to me in such a way. I will make thee as a signet. A signet, if I’m not mistaken is like a signature stamp. A signet ring had a mark that when pressed in wax of some sort left a seal and an impression that let the recipient know it was from the owner of the seal or the ring. Rings and stamps like this were carefully guarded and if one were stolen it was like having your identity stolen. God was giving Zerubbabel the honor of being a seal with His own signature. His words, his actions, his service and comfort were all so approved that God was willing to put His name on it. How well Zerubbabel must have known God to have been so recognized. The verse calls him a servant in previous verses he is mentioned as the governor a position he must have taken very seriously. As I’m typing this I am realizing that just as Zerubbabel was chosen and given this honor, so are we in that we are given the opportunity to be in Christ, who when on earth said if you have seen me, you have seen the Father. Christ was a signet of God Himself. His death brought us this great chance to likewise wear the seal that signifies we belong to God. Our words, our actions, our service and comfort are given the approval of God’s workmanship. We are made as a signet just as Zerubbabel and just as God said to him long ago…he says to us…I have chosen thee. What honor we take for granted.

The Just And The Unjust

Daily Reading: Zephaniah 3

Zephaniah 3:5 “The just Lord is in the midst thereof; he will not do iniquity: every morning doth he bring his judgment to light, he faileth not; but the unjust knoweth no shame.”

Zephaniah 3:17 “The Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; he will save, he will rejoice over thee with joy; he will rest in his love, he will joy over thee with singing.”

These verses are prophetic and are directed toward Jerusalem mainly. They are talking of times I am not familiar with and happenings I do not understand. However, knowing that my God is the same yesterday, today and forever, I can trust that these words are true for the world as I know it. What struck me in verse 5 was the last line…the unjust knoweth no shame. God faithfully brings truth, he shows what is right and what is wrong and does not quit in his attempts to correct and give light to better things. Yet, the unjust refuse to change. It is not true that they are blind…they can see the unfailing hand of God but they are not ashamed. This makes me think of Adam and Eve before the fall. They were naked and they were not ashamed. At that point man was unashamed because of his innocence. In this case man is unashamed because of his humanism. He took the lie that Satan gave to Adam and Eve a step further and believed that not only would he be like God if he sinned…but that he could be god himself. An unjust man can only be unjust if he believes himself to be above the truth that God faithfully reveals. He sees himself as greater than the law of God and unable to be affected by the judgment of God. His salvation is in himself and his own abilities. His freedom is limited to his own power to satisfy himself. There is also a scripture that comes to mind from Habakkuk that says the just shall live by his faith. Would it be wrong to say that if the unjust know no shame, that the just do know shame? I don’t think so. To know shame is to know your own faults and fallibility. To know what sin is and to know the punishment deserved for it. Shame comes with the acknowledgement of your own weakness…this is why living by faith is so important. To live by faith is to live a step beyond your shame. Understanding your weakness and then acknowledging the greatness of God. Yes, I have been wrong but I am made right in the presence of God. I am corrected, changed and even honored by my place in Christ who is seated at the right hand of the Father. The just have to live by faith…or they would die in shame. I love it when the Old Testament preaches Grace. I am thinking that a study on being just would be interesting after looking at these scriptures.

Verse 17 is just beautiful in its description of the love of God our Father toward His children. I love verses that talk about God singing over us. What must that sound like? I think it happens all the time. He sings over us…we often hear about the angels singing and the choirs of heaven but does He constantly join in? Is there a hush before He begins and then the rest of heaven joins in? When we sing in church, does he sing our songs? Wouldn’t it be awesome to get to heaven and hear God singing a song that you wrote? Can anyone hear anything else while He is singing and does He sing over us individually just at times that we need or deserve it? Are His songs specific to circumstances or emotions or are they love songs from the heart of God? I cannot wait to hear God sing.

Tried by the Word

Daily Reading: Zephaniah 1&2, Psalm 15, 45, 75, 105

Psalm 45:10&11 “Hearken, O daughter, and consider, and incline thine ear; forget also thine own people, and thy father’s house; (11) So shall the king greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou him.”

As much as we forget our own people and our father’s house we will find the open arms of a waiting Savior. The king greatly desires our beauty. We are beautiful…regardless of what we think, regardless of how we feel…we are greatly desired. Worship thou Him.

Psalm 105:17-21 “He sent a man before them, even Joseph, who was sold for a servant: (18) Whose feet they hurt with fetters: he was laid in iron: (19) Until the time that his word came: the word of the Lord tried him. (20) The king sent and loosed him: even the ruler of the people, and let him go free. (21) He made him lord of his house, and ruler of all his substance:”

Poor Joseph was used of God, and glorified in the end, but not without much trial, much waiting and much pain. What stuck out to me in reading these verses was the wording in verse 19. It says “until the time that his word came.” When I read it I read it to say until the time that Joseph’s word came. I could be wrong on that but I think for the sake of learning something here I will go with my first impression. God has a word for each of us, a time, a season and a call. He wasn’t making Joseph suffer to teach him a lesson but he was allowing him to suffer until the right time for His word to go forth. He had a task that needed doing. Joseph had the ability, or rather the heart, to do it. The word of the Lord tried him it says. I noticed that it doesn’t say the waiting tried him, or the pain tried him. It doesn’t say that the prison tried him. It says the Word tried him. I think we are often confused and believe that our sufferings are the trials that cause us to better ourselves. It is true that suffering provides us opportunity to learn and grow but the growth itself always comes from the Word. Our healing, our righteousness, our effectiveness, our benefit is not from the trial…it is from the Word. The Word came at the proper time and tried his strength. The Word is so incredible. I’m having trouble putting into words what I’m getting out of this. The Word is so real and so alive…it is that force that causes us to stand or shrink back. When the Word tried Joseph, I believe it was a simple question of asking him if he was ready. Are you the man that I need for the job? Joseph had used his time wisely and though he could have allowed himself to be bitter he waited faithfully for the trying of the Word. He became not only a free man, but a man who changed history. If he had not been ready…if he had been found wanting…his word would have gone elsewhere. Oh to be found ready when my Word comes. Let me be mindful Lord of the Word’s searching me as I search for you.

Stand By Night

Daily Reading: Habakkuk, Psalm 14, 44, 74, 104, 134, Proverbs 14

Psalm 134 “Behold, bless ye the LORD, all ye servants of the LORD, which by night stand in the house of the LORD. (2)Lift up your hands in the sanctuary, and bless the LORD. (3) The LORD that made heaven and earth bless thee out of Zion."

The book of Habakkuk and the first three chapters I read in Psalms began almost exactly the same. A cry for help, a question addressed to God and a plea for His compassion. “How long?” The enemy is overtaking, the powers of evil are crushing and the promise you gave is still eluding me…How long until you save me? How long until you prove that my faith has been well placed? How long before you show the enemy how little he is?

I read on to see if there were instructions on how to act in those times of waiting. I know basically how to act, I just wanted to see if there were some specific thing that the Psalmist might mention. Psalm 134 brought something to mind that I never noticed before. “which by stand night in the house of the Lord.” I’ve known this verse since I was a child. We used to sing it in church when I was young. I thought before that it was odd that they were standing by night in the house of the Lord but never considered it too deeply. This just confirms what I already knew. Night often represents dark and hard times. Watchmen who wait for the morning are looking for a new day…a better tomorrow…a beginning and a consistency that God shows in His faithful rising sun. Everyday…the sun rises…we don’t have to wish for it, we don’t have to pray for it, it just rises…every morning. We praise God in those beginnings, in those fresh new days with His warmth full in our face. These servants were blessing the Lord as they stood by night. Praise Him no matter what…lift up your hands in the sanctuary and praise Him for who He is. Praise Him for all the faithful things that cannot be destroyed. Praise Him that every night brings a morning and that every drop of rain brings life to a dry earth. Praise Him that Heaven is faithfully waiting to accept the humble soul and that provision is made to guarantee our home to come. Praise the Lord, Bless His Name and forget not all His benefits. He has not forgotten…He is always coming for His own.

Led by Light and Truth

Daily Reading: Nahum, Psalm 13, 43

Psalm 43:3 “O send out thy light and thy truth: let them lead me; let them bring me unto thy holy hill, and to thy tabernacles.”

Everyday it is necessary to seek this light and this truth. To be led by truth that is alive and real. Light and truth, the real light and the real truth will always lead me unto the tabernacle of God. If I am led elsewhere I am following falsehood.

Continual Hope

Daily Reading: Micah 7, Psalm 11, 41, 71, 101, 141, Proverbs 11

Psalm 11 “In the Lord put I my trust: how say ye to my soul, Flee as a bird to your mountain? (2) For, lo, the wicked bend their bow, they make ready their arrow upon the string, that they may privily shoot at the upright in heart. (3) If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do? (4) The Lord is in his holy temple, the Lord’s throne is in heaven: his eyes behold, his eyelids try, the children of men. (5) The Lord trieth the righteous: but the wicked and him that loveth violence his soul hateth. (6) Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup. (7) For the righteous Lord loveth righteousness; his countenance doth behold the upright.”

Psalm 71:14-16 “But I will hope continually, and will yet praise thee more and more. (15) My mouth shall shew forth thy righteousness and thy salvation all the day; for I know not the numbers thereof. (16) I will go in the strength of the Lord God: I will make mention of thy righteousness, even of thine only.”

Psalm 71:23&24 “My lips shall greatly rejoice when I sing unto thee: and my soul, which thou hast redeemed. (24) My tongue also shall talk of thy righteousness all the day long: for they are confounded, for they are brought unto shame, that seek my hurt.”

It seems a long time that we have sought God concerning our situation with our houses. I have come and gone from the haven of faith but ultimately I hold fast to the instructions we were given upon entering this arrangement. Buy the house. That’s all we knew…and that’s what we did, never expecting 7 months to pass before selling our old house. It is in fact still sitting empty…waiting for buyers to come and find its merit. I love that house. I cannot understand why it hasn’t sold unless it is on account of the unseemly practices of some of the neighbors. There are two homes very near ours that sport old cars in the yard. This is not only against the law it is unsightly and aggravating. I will not blame the cars completely, there have been a few things that we left undone at the house.

Regardless…I feel that God simply wants us to rejoice. To look at Him and see that beyond all the circumstance we are still surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses who see the heart of our conviction and cheer on our pursuit of Christ and all His glory. We have not lost our hope…it seems invisible at times but we have not built on sand…as the hymn so aptly states…”my hope is built on nothing less, than Jesus blood and righteousness, I dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly lean on Jesus name.” If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do? The Lord is in His holy temple. The Lord is on His throne…He has not forgotten and He has not missed our cry for help. He will deliver! For the Lord loveth righteousness.

Micah's Story

Daily Reading: Micah 4-6

Micah 4:1-4 “But in the last days it shall come to pass, that the mountain of the house of the LORD shall be established in the top of the mountains, and it shall be exalted above the hills; and people shall flow unto it. (2) And many nations shall come, and say, Come, and let us go up to the mountain of the LORD, and to the house of the God of Jacob; and he will teach us of his ways, and we will walk in his paths: for the law shall go forth of Zion, and the word of the LORD from Jerusalem. (3) And he shall judge among many people, and rebuke strong nations afar off; and they shall beat their swords into plowshares, and their spears into pruninghooks: nation shall not lift up a sword against nation, neither shall they learn war any more. (4) But they shall sit every man under his vine and under his fig tree; and none shall make them afraid: for the mouth of the LORD of hosts hath spoken it.”

I have never enjoyed the prophetic books much because I don’t always understand them, or know what and when they are supposed to be talking about. This passage however bring such a peaceful picture to mind I cannot help but enjoy it. “people shall flow unto it.” That’s so neat. To think of people just streaming to learn more of the awesome love of God. To think that if we could live under the law that comes forth of Zion we would have no fear. His Law is Love.

My Heart Shall Live

Daily Reading: Micah 3, Psalm 9, 39, 69, 99, 129, Proverbs 9

Psalm 69:30-36 “I will praise the name of God with a song, and will magnify him with thanksgiving. (31) This also shall please the Lord better than an ox or bullock that hath horns and hoofs. (32) The humble shall see this, and be glad: and your heart shall live that seek God. (33) For the Lord heareth the poor, and despiseth not his prisoners. (34) Let the heaven and earth praise him, the seas, and everything that moveth therein. (35) For God will save Zion, and will build the cities of Judah: that they may dwell there, and have it in possession. (36) The seed also of his servants shall inherit it: and they that love his name shall dwell therein.”

Your heart shall live that seek God. Some days it feels that my heart cannot survive. I am heavy with melancholy and weak from searching for what is wrong. How simple the answer is that He gives here. Do not seek to find what is wrong…seek God. Allow Him to show you first life and love and then correction if needed. How often have I come to God in tears asking Him what is wrong with me. Why is there pain and no apparent cause, why is there sadness and no apparent reason? Stop looking for something to cry about and start looking at God’s goodness. The pain and the sadness will reveal themselves as the deception that they are. God produces light that scans the deepest corners of our hearts and shows us the lies that Satan has hid there. Praise the name of God with a song and magnify Him with thanksgiving. This will please the Lord. The promises of God are true no matter how I feel. The Word of God is still alive no matter how things look. My heart shall live if I seek God.

Psalm 129:2 “Many a time have they afflicted me from my youth: yet they have not prevailed against me.”

How often have I been given rise to complain? I no more than anyone else, but plenty of pain is the lot of all of us here. There is a line however, that I will not allow the enemy to cross. He cannot prevail. No matter how deep the water, I cannot drown. No matter how hot the fire, I cannot burn. I may be slowed in my progress, I may be tempted, tortured and shamed, but I am not defeated and I will not cower under the weight of a heavy handed lie. Praise shall be my first defense and the Word of God my weapon. I am more than a conqueror in the Name of Jesus Christ my Lord. He it is who has completed this battle in my place and I now rest in the truth of His victory and the peace of His glory. I am risen with Him, I am fully alive in Him and I am seated with Him at the right hand of the Father. The folly of ill attempts on my resolve is proven when I seek the face of God. My heart shall live because I seek God. My soul shall rejoice because I find Him.

Delighting in Meekness

Daily Reading: Micah 1-2, Psalm 7, Psalm 37

Psalm 37:3-5 “Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. (4) Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. (5) Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.”

There is so much said in this chapter it is too much to regurgitate here. I wanted to capture a bit of it to point out it’s main message which is so simple but obviously important as it is repeated and said in multiple ways verse after verse. Trust, rest, delight Commit thy way, & wait patiently on the Lord. This is stressed along with don’t fret, depart from evil, cease from anger and forsake wrath. David wrote these things and expresses his confidence in the Lords ability to do justice. It is a difficult thing to trust in God when the devil has you backed into a corner. How simple it sounds here but if we internalize these words and really apply them to everyday things…it’s a challenge that few are up to.

Personally I find it hard not to fret, not to complain and question when our Sunday school class doesn’t show up for class, for events, or let us know that they can’t make it. I find it hard not to be angry when I have sacrificed for people who aren’t honest and try to avoid me. Week after week, we take time to study, make phone-calls and attempt to meet the needs of people who aren’t willing to answer simple questions and I wonder why. But these words of David’s would challenge me…not them. They challenge me to let God be the one who provides, who feeds, grants desires and brings to pass the calling I’ve tried to answer. I have to remind myself that when God calls His children into service, He is not asking us to be little gods. He simply wants us to stand at attention until given specific tasks. We are not to worry about the outcome or fret about the procedure. Just do what I say…just be obedient…just worship…just rest…just trust He orders. We are left wondering, but not alone.

Psalm 37:11 “But the meek shall inherit the earth; and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.”

What does it mean to be meek?

meek adj. meek·er, meek·est
1. Showing patience and humility; gentle.
2. Easily imposed on; submissive.

meek
adj 1: humble in spirit or manner; suggesting retiring mildness or even cowed submissiveness; "meek and self-effacing" [syn: mild, modest] 2: very docile; "tame obedience"; "meek as a mouse"- Langston Hughes [syn: tame] 3: evidencing little spirit or courage; overly submissive or compliant; "compliant and anxious to suit his opinions of those of others"; "a fine fiery blast against meek conformity"- Orville Prescott; "she looked meek but had the heart of a lion"; "was submissive and subservient" [syn: compliant, spiritless]

This doesn’t all sound like something desirable. As I’m reading these words though I think, maybe it is accurate. Maybe being meek simply means to hand over all I am to God. Maybe being spiritless isn’t so bad. Maybe that just means my spirit is completely and totally surrendered to God’s. Isn’t that what we all need to be? Jesus Himself did nothing without the Father’s permission or order. Nothing! It really says Nothing. That’s meekness. Complete submission, complete surrender. That doesn’t mean He was boring. I think that’s what we get confused. We think that if we are meek and submissive we end up being a doormat. No…we aren’t submissive to other people in this verse…we are submissive to God, to His ways, His personality and His passion. We celebrate the Passion of Christ, but as the meek Son of God…His passion was God’s Passion. If we are meek toward God’s ways and His authority…we will have Passion that causes worlds to change…The meek shall inherit the earth. Not the water and the dirt of it, the rule of it, the changing of it, the promise and potential of all men. We are children of a King…so seldom do we live as the princes and princesses that we are.

The last part of verse 11 says that the meek will delight themselves in the abundance of peace. I can’t even picture that. Delighting in the abundance of peace must be a little like waking up in heaven. Yet, it is available now…we can live in an abundance of peace. No fear, no fumbling, no doubt, no shame…completely rested and at ease about today and tomorrow and all that is to come. Rest! It’s so hard to imagine not worrying about what I need to do, yet that is His command. Rest!

The Crooked Shall Be Made Straight

Daily Reading: Concordance references for “Crooked”

Isaiah 40:4 “Every valley shall be exalted and every mountain and hill shall be made low: and the crooked shall be made straight, and the rough places plain:”

Isaiah 42:13-16 “The Lord shall go forth as a mighty man, he shall stir up jealousy like a man of war: he shall cry, yea, roar; he shall prevail against his enemies. (14) I have long time holden my peace; I have been still, and refrained myself: now will I cry like a travailing woman; I will destroy and devour at once. (15) I will make waste mountains and hills, and dry up all their herbs; and I will make the rivers islands, and I will dry up the pools. (16) And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known: I will make darkness light before them, and crooked things straight. These things will I do unto them and not forsake them.”

Luke 3:5-17 “Every valley shall be filled, and every mountain and hill shall be brought low; and the crooked shall be made straight, and the rough ways shall be made smooth; (6) And all flesh shall see the salvation of God. (7) Then said he to the multitude that came forth to be baptized of him, O generation of vipers, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath to come? (8) Bring forth therefore fruits worthy of repentance, and begin not to say within yourselves, We have Abraham to our father: for I say unto you, that God is able of these stones to raise up children unto Abraham. (9) And now also the axe is laid unto the root of the trees: every tree therefore which bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. (10) And the people asked him, saying, What shall we do then? (11) He answereth and saith unto them, He that hath two coats, let him impart to him that hath none and he that hath meat, let him do likewise. (12) Then came also publicans to be baptized, and said unto him, Master, what shall we do? (13) And he said unto them, exact no more than that which is appointed you. (14) And the soldiers likewise demanded of him, saying, And what shall we do? And he said unto them, Do violence to no man, Neither accuse any falsely; and be content with your wages. (15) And as the people were in expectation, and all men mused in their hearts of John, whether he were the Christ or not; (16) John answered, saying unto them all, I indeed baptize you with water; but one mightier than I cometh, the latchet of whose shoes I am not worthy to unloose: he shall baptize you with the Holy Ghost and with fire: (17) Whose fan is in his hand, and he will thoroughly purge his floor, and will gather the wheat into his garner; but the chaff he will burn with fire unquenchable.”

This is so interesting to me. I have been experiencing back pain and I have been wondering why now? I don’t want to turn every little circumstance into a spiritual warm fuzzy, but it seems rather ironic that the weekend that I plan to finally be obedient and get baptized, my back is hurting to the point of not being able to stand up straight. I have already determined that I will go ahead and be baptized regardless of how much it hurts. I am not going to wait another month and find some new excuse not to do it. I’ve already told people I am doing it and it’s going to happen.

Last night I looked in the mirror and realized the pain is quite legitimate in that I am visibly crooked. My upper body is leaning obviously to the left. It looks almost as bad as it feels. After doing all the practical things I know to do for myself I called one of the elders and hopefully I can get over there this afternoon to have him pray for me.

When I saw how crooked I am I immediately thought of the verse that talks about making the crooked straight. I’ve always imagined that to mean something relating more to crooked paths but it has incessantly played in my head so I looked it up this morning and the scriptures above are what I found. It never says specifically what is crooked but I would still say that the context is more likely interpreted to mean pathways. This is still an analogy and I can still claim what the Bible says. However when I got to the scripture in Luke I was surprised to find that it was a baptism service that instigated John the Baptist to quote Isaiah. Maybe this is more about Baptism than I thought. I noticed that as he is speaking to the people the scripture mentions three groups: the children of Abraham, the publicans, and the soldiers. I am quite sure there is a sermon in this somewhere, but I don’t know what each of these groups represents entirely. I will say that of all of them I would probably fit into the first one. I am not Jewish but I have been grafted into the vine nearly as long as I can remember. I am going into this baptism with a hard heart. I honestly don’t want to do it. I’m embarrassed and I find it hard to admit that there is any reason for me to do it other than the fact that my pastor said I should. That’s not the right attitude. My pride needs to be destroyed before I go through with this. I need to see that God wants this for me. That I have been disobedient in not doing it before and that I am not too righteous to be seen as immature in the eyes of the rest of my church. I need to repent of my arrogance and find joy in the straight path that I will find on the other side of this task. John baptized with water, but one mightier than he came and wishes so badly to baptize believers in the Holy Ghost and fire. Even so, Lord Jesus Come!

Discontinued Ambition

Daily Reading: Jonah 2-4

Jonah 4:4 “Then said the Lord, Doest thou well to be angry?”

God asks funny questions. I just have to wonder if Jonah heard the sarcasm in His voice when God asked him this. Do you really think you should be angry? I can totally see Jonah pouting and taking his ball and bat and sitting in the bleachers to wait for the game to break up. Surely God wasn’t going to let these people get away with the way they’ve acted. Surely God wasn’t going to make him look like a fool. After all he’d been through and now God wasn’t coming through on His end of the deal. Even from the booth he made for himself which must have given him a good view of the city his only perspective was from narrow vision. Narrow and prideful was his mind, as he waited for Nineveh to reap it’s reward. But God gave mercy instead of destruction and Jonah acted the part of the prodigal’s brother.

Once again I am reminded that a calling does not require that I know all the details or the avenue that God wishes to work. It only requires my obedience. Do now what I know to do and allow God to work in any way He chooses. I can rejoice in any outcome if I am focused on pleasing God and not myself. I can rejoice whether my obedience led me into fire or flood. I can rejoice whether my obedience leads me into peaceful valleys where no one but God sees me being obedient, or onto peaks of excitement where I am cheered on by hosts of saints. It is not the how…that should drive me to obedience, it is the Who!

Oh, bless the Lord, ye saints and praise Him in His holy temple. I want to get to the point where I discontinue all ambition save the glory of a glimpse of Christ.

From the Net to the Blanket

Daily Reading: Obadiah, Psalm 1, Psalm 31

Obadiah verses 17 & 18 “But upon mount Zion shall be deliverance, and there shall be holiness; and the house of Jacob shall possess their possessions. (18) And the house of Jacob shall be a fire, and the house of Joseph a flame, and the house of Esau for stubble, and they shall kindle in them, and devour them; and there shall not be any remaining of the house of Esau; for the Lord has spoken it.”

I have never understood what the deal was with Esau. Jacob cheated Esau out of his blessing as the eldest son and from then on Esau was just cast out and on his own. It seems like Jacob would be the one that should be punished. Jacob did reap a lot of the lies that he sowed but still he is the one that gets all the attention from his birth to right now. Was Esau punished because he didn’t care enough? I remember even as a kid hearing the story of how Jacob bought Esau’s birthright with a bowl of soup and thinking couldn’t he make his own soup? Grab a sandwich or something, surely one bowl of soup isn’t worth your birthright. I felt sorry for him. Now I wonder if that is just a picture of his character. Maybe he just didn’t care about anything and Jacob did. Maybe he was guilty of apathy and it was just distasteful to God. I don’t know. From a bowl of soup to his descendants being devoured is a pretty long road of bad circumstances. I’d like to know more about this.

Psalm 1 “Blessed is the man who walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. (2) But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. (3) And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper. (4) The ungodly are not so: but are like the chaff which the wind driveth away. (5) Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous. (6) For the Lord knoweth the way of the righteous: but the way of the ungodly shall perish.”

One of my favorite scriptures. Psalm one is so simply complete. Here is how to be blessed. Just do this and don’t do this and you’ll have it. And how blessed you’ll be! Like a tree planted by water, you’ll bear fruit and WHATEVER YOU DO WILL PROSPER! I love that. You can’t get more blessed than that. I pray that for Kris and for Owen all the time. I know that God has great things in mind for those boys.

Psalm 31:4 “Pull me out of the net that they have laid privily for me: for thou art my strength.”

So many of the Psalms talk about the traps laid out by the enemy and how trusting in God causes you to be delivered or may even cause the enemy to fall into his own trap. This verse is one that admits…I’ve fallen into the trap. I love to see the humanity of the Psalmist. He’s triumphant and full of praise and can almost seem too good to be true at times, but every now and then you hear him weeping and confessing his inadequacies. Here in verse 4 he says…they laid this net for me and I didn’t see it. I was just walking along and I fell. And now, I can’t get out. Please God, you’re the only strength I have. Can you help me out of this mess? Then from his experiences he says in verse 24 “Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the Lord.” He doesn’t just say that God will pull you out of the net like He did for me. He say…He will strengthen your heart. No matter how long you’re in the net…your heart can remain strong in the Lord. No matter how deep the pit is…your heart can remain strong in the Lord. Hope in the Lord.

One thing that God is showing me is not how strong He is, but rather, how kind He is. He doesn't want to just pull me from the net, he wants to revive me. When the Psalmist says He will strengthen your heart I had to imagine how. God doesn't just pull us from danger or pain and then say...now run, get out of here before they get you again. He pulls us up, cradles us and carry us to safety. He wants us with Him. He wants to warm us by a fire, wrap a warm blanket around us and feed us with something so filling and so satisfying we'll never want to leave His side. We can snuggle up to Him and know that He will never let us go. That's the hope we can have. Hope that isn't wishful thinking, Hope that's secure in the knowledge of truth. Hope that expects good things and waits with anticipation.

The Proverbs 31 Man

Daily Reading: Amos 9, Proverbs 31

Amos 9:13 “Behold, the days come, saith the Lord, that the plowman shall overtake the reaper, and the treader of grapes him that soweth seed; and the mountains shall drop sweet wine, and all the hills shall melt.”

I’m trying to imagine this. The plowman overtaking the reaper I guess would mean that the harvest is so great it cannot all be gathered before plowing time. Think of it. A harvest so vast it takes all fall and winter to bring it in. I like that.

Proverbs 31:1 “The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.”

This morning I thought of the significance of this verse. We, as Christian women, are often shown this verse to teach us how to be good wives, mothers and women of God. But this very first verse says that it wasn’t for a woman that these words were first taught, it was for a man. I don’t want to minimize the value of these verses for women but I would say that they need to be taught to men just as fervently as they are to women. Young men need to know what to look for in a wife. They need to know what is valuable and what is worthy of their attention. Also…I think that I, as a mother, need to be the one teaching this to my son. Of course my first lessons need to be by example, but when he is older I need to go through these verses with him and explain to him the modern day example they set for him.

Just as you hear men say things like, “I know exactly what that boy is after…it was the same thing I was after at his age.” Women know flirtation and manipulation when they see it. We are sensitive to when another woman is trying to get the attention of our man much sooner than he is. We are sensitive to when a woman is trying to get the attention of any man. We see it, recognize it and gossip about it. Aren’t we cool? I want to teach my son, not only to recognize these things, but to discern the heart behind all of it. If a good girl is trying to get his attention…he should know it and respond correctly. If a bad girl is trying to get his attention he should know it and run away!

Proverbs 31:31 “Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.”

Teaching young men what is virtuous would also include teaching them how to treat a virtuous woman. I think this verse proves that women are hungry for affirmation. We are like men in that respect. Men need to know that women respect them and women need to know that they are loved, and admired. They need respect too but it’s a different sort of respect. Give her the opportunity to share who and what she is, show her that you trust her by allowing her to prove what she can do. Women are not out to best their man when they are given the chance to just enjoy what they do and allow other people to admire their work. We, as women, need to see results in what we do. We are fulfilled by knowing that we have been what God has called us to be…a helpmate. If we are never told that we helped or if we never see the fruit of our hands, we will find that fulfillment elsewhere.

Blessed with Peace

Daily Reading: Amos 6, 7 & 8, Psalm 29, 59, 89, 119:153-176

Psalm 29:11 "The Lord will give strength unto his people; the Lord will bless his people with peace."

The Lord will. I know that we can walk in His strength daily and have His peace at all times, but this morning as I read this it stood out to me that both gifts are promised in the future. He will give it, says to me that at the moment I don't have it. I think this promise is for that extra level of strength and peace that we need at times. The previous verse says that the Lord sitteth upon the flood. I think He's saying that during hard times...when the water rises...not only will we have the strength and peace that gets us through each day, but He will give us an extra measure. Inner strength to handle the floods as they come with faith and confidence and an immersion of peace that allows us to think and act with clarity and Godly wisdom.

Psalm 119:165 "Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them."

Daily peace, great daily peace comes from loving the law. How do you love the law? By understanding it. Recognizing the truth and the intent of it's source and knowing how beneficial it is to live under it's protection. People who love the law not only have great peace, they also have the advantage of never being offended. Nothing shall offend them. How cool is that? Political correctness has no place to roost in the heart of one who cannot be offended. Does it make sense then to say that people who are easily offended do not love the law? I think so. People who break easily haven't placed themselves under truth. Truth protects and law guides. People who offend easily are wandering. They have no desire for truth because it may cause them to feel conviction or the need to change. The law should be flexible they say...what if it hurts someone. The law should be changed because it excludes some and exalts others. I say emphatically NO. Learning to love the law and the creator of the law has freed me to understand that "the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin." (Romans 7:14) I concede that the law is good and I can only be guided by it's goodness. When I fail I am corrected by the law and loved by the lawmaker. He is my ultimate protection. He is my judge and my jury. He alone causes me to see the merits of the law and therefore understand that I can never be offended. When I know that the one who set the law in place loves me more than the law...I can love the law and never be offended. This is a great peace.

Regard

Daily Reading: Amos 4 & 5, Psalm 28

Psalm 28:5 "Because they regard not the works of the Lord, nor the operation of his hands, he shall destroy them, and not build them up."

I feel very convicted this morning about this very thing. I miss God sometimes. I don't blaspheme Him or outright judge His operations as evil...I just ignore Him. What horrible consequences this verse brings to mind. I don't think this is a one time offense that is punished so severely and I think that I am still safe from such a fate. I simply see in myself the tendency to allow my feelings to overplay the potential I have. I see what is possible and try to make it happen. I try to handle things myself because I have talents or gifts that God has given me for such a time as this...right? How arrogant to believe that I can do anything without Him. I am tired, and maybe that is where He wants me. To be so tired I have to hand over my silly little toy tools and say..."Here, you fix it."

One Thing

Daily Reading: Amos 1 - 3, Psalm 27

Amos 3:3 "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?" I've been working in my Mind Of Christ workbook and learning of the ordered mind of Christ. There is no conflict in a mind that only seeks the will of God and this verse in Amos really triggered conviction because I am not so ordered, so pure or so focused. I want to walk with God, but I so often live a life that disagrees with Him. What mercy He shows in never leaving me.

Psalm 27:4-6 "One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to enquire in his temple. (5) For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock. (6) And now shall mine head be lifted up above mine enemies round about me: therefore will I offer in his tabernacle sacrifices of joy; I will sing, yea, I will sing praises unto the Lord."

One thing. How hard it is to desire one thing. I have so many desires I can't keep track of them all and yet...all I really need is One thing. It seems like such a long road to get to that place...to have a heart like David. In reality though, I think it is just a matter of surrender and for some it takes a long time for others it is simply a process of opening the eyes to see the truth. The Bible is full of promises like this...Matthew 6:33 is one of my favorites. "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." This is what the Bible study lesson is about this morning. Seeking what's important. If we truly desire the One thing...the presence of God...we will automatically receive His protections, His peace, His affection and His joy. I can remember living that way. In my early twenties I was passionate about the business of doing the will of God every moment. I was so full of faith that I said and did seemingly wacky things in order to always and completely fall in line with seeking first His Kingdom. I felt completely free of all other concerns...God took care of those things...they were "added unto me" as He saw fit. I have felt for some time that I have slipped in this area. That I am no longer up upon the rock (vs. 5). That as time passes and distractions have come I have taken myself down step by step, until I can only look longingly at the top and remember the view for what it was to me at one time. Now, with a family and the responsibilities that I have, it is harder to drop all other concerns and focus on the Kingdom of God, but it is infinitely more important. What greater example can I be to Owen than to show him true peace under the protection and instruction of God. What is better for a husband than to have a wife that knows and follows the heart of God.

David ends verse 6 by once again reminding me that praise is key in accomplishing true faith. "I will sing, yea, I will sing praises unto the Lord." My praise unifies my heart, and surrenders my will. I have often said that worship is not just something we do on Sunday morning...it is a lifestyle. Worship is a lifestyle of confession, that "I am not God and I do not wish to apply for the job." (from Intimacy, the Longing of Every Human Heart by Terry Hershey)

It's so funny because I've known the answer for so long and yet I am continually realizing how many areas of my life still need to be surrendered. I don't wish to go back to where I was years ago...I want what God has for me now. I want to forget those things which are behind, (even the good things) and press on toward the goal of the high calling of God. What is the goal? To know Him! Really...that's all it is. Just to know Him.

Psalm 27:8 "When thou saidst, Seek ye my face; my heart said unto thee, Thy face, Lord, will I seek."

I Will Bless the Lord

Daily Reading: Joel 3, Psalm 26, 56, 86

Psalm 26:12 "My foot standeth in an even place: in the congregation will I bless the Lord."

My foot standeth in an even place. A balanced, firm and level place. He has not only set good boundaries to protect me. He has allowed me the security of level ground. I am not afraid when I stand. I am not afraid to walk after the one whose footsteps have cleared and leveled the ground before me. As I stand among the saints...in the congregation...I am standing firmly so that without reservation I can abandon all fear, all worry and all questions to bless the Lord.

Psalm 56:12 & 13 "Thy vows are upon me, O God: I will render praises unto thee. (13) For thou hast delivered my soul from death: wilt not thou deliver my feet from falling, that I may walk before God in the light of the living?"

Thou hast delivered my soul from death. I am made acceptable to you because of the Cross of Christ. I am saved from Hell and will spend eternity with you in Heaven...but what about now? Can I count on you to deliver me from daily snares? Will you keep me from falling again and again while I am still here on earth? Protect me from Hell, Yes, but protect me from sin...that I may walk unashamed, free from the shadows of embarrassment and guilt...let me walk before you God, in the light of the living.

Psalm 86:11-13 "Teach me thy way, O Lord; I will walk in thy truth: unite my heart to fear thy name. (12) I will praise thee, O Lord my God, with all my heart: and I will glorify thy name for evermore. (13) For great is thy mercy toward me: and thou hast delivered my soul from the lowest hell."

Unite my heart to fear thy name. Oh, to have a heart with one desire. How simple life could be if we truly meditated on this word and really focused our hearts toward Christ. Our hearts, not collectively, but individually are not united. We have one heart with many wants and passions. I so desire to serve God but I desire to live for myself as well. I desire to see us do well financially so that we can afford nice things to comfort, fill and protect us. I desire to see my family love and care for one another in health, both physically and emotionally. I desire to travel and experience and enjoy the world around me. I desire carnal things as well as Godly things. I desire to have more than what I need, I desire to eat more than what will fill me, I desire to look good, be admired, looked up to and be seen as "having it all together". I am human, with human desires. My heart is sadly divided. Verse 12 has a simple remedy for my divided heart. I will praise thee, O Lord my God, with all my heart. For moments at a time I can be united. If I praise Him with all my heart...forget the other desires to lift up the name of Jesus. Putting aside all the lack that makes up my feeble emotions I will stand before God in awe and fear to praise Him. I have one heart united.

Do you suppose that if I were to do this often...it would stick? Is it possible that a heart that praises God more and more often exercises a "unity muscle"? Would it make sense to practice being unified? I think so.

Rend Your Heart

Daily Reading: Joel 1 & 2, Psalm 25

Joel 2:13 "And rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil."

Rending a garment is just a symbolic way to show regret or repentance but I believe from this verse that God was tired, and is still tired, of seeing our show of repentance and never seeing our hearts changed. Rend your heart, He says, break your will, bow your desires and passions down at my feet and let me fill what you have emptied. Let me show you who I am...the gracious, forgiving, merciful, loving, kind, compassionate me. I can prove your broken heart is worth repairing, I can fill the void that your desires never could.

He is a good God, but we rarely give Him the chance to do more than answer the prayers for what we desire. We bring Him what we think is noble and try to convince Him of the merits of our passions. He will sometimes oblige these things but He wants so badly to show us more. What could He do for us, to us and in us if we came to Him empty handed? What if we just came to Him with nothing but our praise? What if we knelt down and said..."God, I don't know enough to know what I want...will you just fill me with you today?" Can you imagine what He could do with that? No, you can't imagine...you're not creative enough. I don't care who you are...your mind cannot conceive the good that God has for you!

In verse 25 of the same chapter: "And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpiller, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you."

Not only does he promise to be merciful (v.13) but he promises to restore. He knows that the desires of the flesh (no matter how noble they are) cannot fulfill and they cannot serve you and comfort you as His desires for you could have. He knows that by the time you come to Him you have missed out on the blessings that He had waiting for you. He does not flaunt them, turn up His nose and say...look what you could have had if you had been a good girl. No...He restores...He gives...He blesses...He offers abundance for our lack and freedom to replace our bondage.

verse 26 "And ye shall eat in plenty, and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you: and my people shall never be ashamed."

Psalm 25:1 & 2 "Unto thee, O Lord, do I lift up my soul. (2) O my God, I trust in thee: let me not be ashamed, let not mine enemies triumph over me."

Here again...I lift up my soul to God and put my trust in Him for the gracious reward that never leaves me ashamed.